Make Your Scenes Pop!




 

Do your stories pop?

Do they engage your reader and give them a vision in their mind through the words you’ve strung together on the page. As writers, our goal is to create clear and detailed images through the use of descriptive language. If you’re not using descriptive writing in your family history stories then you are missing an opportunity to show rather than tell. Descriptive writing adds texture, colour and dimension to our stories. It is how we make reading a sensory experience for our readers.

My favourite quote that helps to illustrate showing in scenes remains:

 “DON’T TELL ME THE MOON IS SHINING; SHOW ME THE GLINT OF LIGHT ON BROKEN GLASS.”

                                                                                                                              ANTON CHEKHOV

As we discussed in How to Write a Scene, detailed description, imagery and figurative language are components of a scene that we heavily rely on to make a scene vivid and in full colour for the reader. Today’s post pulls together a few tips to help you improve your use of description in writing your scenes.

Use all of your senses.

As we mentioned in How to Write a Scene using your senses is an essential ingredient of descriptive writing. Using the senses of touch, taste, hearing, seeing and smelling are all equally important in bringing your ancestor’s experience to life on the page. We often tend only to use sight, but employing a combination of senses gives your reader a much deeper experience.

Avoid Clichés

Clichés are words or expressions that have been overused. They may have been original at one time but through overuse they have become clichés. Be aware of them and find fresh and original ways to describe your story. Some examples of clichés include dead as a doornail, smart as a whip, sweet as sugar. You get the idea.

Use a Thesaurus

Try to avoid using the same words in a sentence, paragraph or, if it is an uncommon word, in the story, unless the word is used for effect. This applies to standard words and less common words. Use a thesaurus to find alternative words that convey the same meaning. (I used the word “word” eight times – did you notice?)

Use Personification, Similes, and Metaphors

Personifications, similes, and metaphors can add sensuous references vividly, explain things, express emotion and entertain your reader. They add richness to your writing and show an image in a vibrant way through example rather than tell directly. They should replace, enhance or define adjectives like, beautiful, sweet, picturesque and others. We’ve all learned about similes and metaphors in school. Perhaps, it’s time for a refresher course, and a little practice to help you see just how important it can be in writing your family history stories.

Let’s take a look at each with examples from the memoir Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls.

Personification

Personification adds human personality traits to inanimate objects.

“Finally, we entered hill country, climbing higher and deeper into the Appalachian Mountains, stopping from time to time to let the Oldsmobile catch its breath.”

Simile

A simile ties two things together using the words ‘as’ or ‘like.’

“ It was like sewing meat. It was sewing meat.”  Mr. Walls gets beat up and asks for Jeannette to sew up a gash on his arm.

Metaphor

Metaphors are figurative comparisons that describe one thing by directly assigning it the traits of another, so one idea is understood in terms of the other.

Rex says Maureen “is a sick puppy, the runt of the litter, who should have been drowned at birth”

This statement expresses how Rex feels Maureen is weak and dependent, and the rest of the family has to provide for her.

 

Don’t Over Do it!

Beginning writers tend to lack confidence in writing description in those early days, but once they gain an understanding of description, they can then go too far and overdo it. As I mentioned in writing a scene, too much detail can completely overtake a story and it bears repeating again. Once we get the handle on description and detail we tend to find a reason to think more is better. It is not. As the artist of this work you must make decisions about which descriptions and details serve the story best, the feeling you want to portray on the page.  Description should enhance your characters and their world, not overwhelm it.

Related Post

Goals, Motivations and StakesGoals, Motivations and Stakes

You’ve chosen your Protagonist Ancestor, and now it’s time to structure his or her story in a format that will keep your readers entertained and engaged from beginning to end.

Every main character in a story has a goal that is ultimately the heart of the story. A reader stays with a story to see if the main character reach their goal. Your ancestor’s goal is motivated by something in their life, usually in their history, an experience, or event that may of had a substantial impact on them and their actions. In addition, if they didn’t achieve their goal, they fear a loss. It could be an external loss such as in a material item, money or land, or even the loss of life, or it could be internal losses, such as respect or honour.

Before you begin to write your story, it’s important to recognize the goals, motivations and stakes of your ancestor. They are critical to not only understanding them but also in shaping their story.

I love these next three questions because by answering them you not only identify your ancestor’s goals, motivations and stakes but you understand how they relate to each other.

GOAL – WHAT DOES YOUR ANCESTOR WANT?  
MOTIVATION – WHY DOES YOUR ANCESTOR WANT IT?
STAKES – WHAT HAPPENS IF YOUR ANCESTOR FAILS TO GET WHAT HE WANTS? WHAT WILL HAPPEN? WHAT COULD HAPPEN IF YOUR ANCESTOR HAD FAILS TO MEET HIS GOAL?

Let’s look at each of these elements individually.

Goal  – There are any number of material and or emotional desires we seek; these are our goals. Your family history story needs a goal, which means your Protagonist Ancestor needs a goal. Where do I find the goal of my ancestor? Look at the actions in their lives. Look at the events on their timeline, did they emigrate, why? Did they own a great deal of land, did they fight in a war, did they become famous, or influential in politics, did they have a large family? Our ancestor’s actions are clues to what they valued in life, their goals, the wants or desires that they put most of their effort towards.

Does your ancestor want something so badly that they are prepared to destroy or be destroyed to attain this goal? To make sacrifices? To take risks? Did they join the army because they believe in the cause? Did leave the country because they didn’t support the cause?

Of course, not all goals are created equally, the bigger the goal, the bigger the story, the bigger the story, the more compelling the read. Try to find a goal that you feel will provide a big story that will engage your family. Stop thinking of your family history as a chronological timeline of events,  but rather a desire, a want, with obstacles to overcome on the path to it.

Motivations – Once you’ve determined the purpose of your story, the next step is to understand their motivation. Why did your ancestor have this particular goal? Each and every human being who walked this earth had wants, desires that were driven by a motivation. Through your research, you wish to understand what that motivation may be. For example, if your ancestor’s goal was to own land, what in their history, their past motivated that desire? Look at motivation as the back story to the want.

 Stakes – What happens if your ancestor does not fulfill his goal? The stakes are why we keep reading, if there is nothing at stake, no risk then there is little reason to keep turning the page. Of course, not all stories are life-or-death. Again big stakes produce significant stories. While the risks may not necessarily be life or death, our ancestors faced some very real stakes. For example – war, poverty, deportation, inscription, jail, poorhouses are only a few of the outcomes that may have occurred if they had not taken actions towards their goals.

Identify the goals, motivations and stakes of your ancestor and you have identified the heart of their story, along with the elements on which to shape your family history story plot.

 

Tips and Tools for a Rocking First DraftTips and Tools for a Rocking First Draft

Rocking out a good first draft doesn’t just happen it isn’t a matter of chance but rather a result of careful planning prior to writing. We constantly hear about writers who take one month to produce a draft for a book or story, who sit down and crank out a first draft in a month all the time. Of course, it is messy and will result in many rewrites and revisions. Writing a first draft in a month is certainly doable, but maybe we want a good first draft, not a mess. The only way to accomplish this is with a plan that addresses every aspect of writing a first draft, from mapping out your story to creating a scene guide, to gathering the details of your ancestor’s life, to surrounding yourself with an environment conducive to writing. Without a strategy most likely your attempt at writing your family history story will end badly.

Take some time before you begin to write your first draft and enlist the five tips and tools below. Together they will help you to pre-plan your first family history story draft.

Set a daily goal 

Tip: Writing a first draft in one month is about the numbers. The best way to do that is to do the math in advance and decide how many words you plan to write daily. By writing daily and with a word count goal, you’ll keep yourself on track to complete your mission, whether it’s a 20,000-word short story for your legacy family history book or an 80,000-word epic family history novel. Identify in advance your project and the word count. Do the math.
Tool: Download our free word count tools.

Take some time to outline your plot and scenes

Tip: The best way to write every day is to have a plan. It will be difficult to hit your word count and write a good first draft if you don’t have a plan of what you intend to write each day. Take some time upfront to plan your story map and outline your scenes. This way, each day when you sit down to write, you’ll know exactly what you plan to write.
Tool: Consider our 1-hour webinar One Month to a Draft. We walk you through the pre-plan process of mapping our your story and outlining your scenes prior to writing.

Choose one ancestor, one story

Tip: Don’t try to write four hundred years of history in one month. Break your family history into small manageable chunks; consider one ancestor, one story at a time. Choose your ancestor and complete a character profile. Character profiles help you understand your ancestor intimately and provide you with important details and that will be necessary in bringing your ancestor to life on the page.
Tool: Complete the Authentic Ancestor Profile in Authentic Ancestors, Workbook Number 2.

Develop a daily writing habit

Tip: A daily writing routine is essential to completing a first draft and making writing a part of your life. By finding the environment, tools, and time of day that work best for you, you can turn writing into a part of your everyday life. Habits will help you to centre yourself in the writing process quickly and maintain your focus pushing away distractions.
Tool: Getting Ready to Write Workbook 1, offers many tips and advice for clearing your schedule, creating writing habits and declaring yourself a writer.

Don’t work towards perfection

Tip: While we may not want a messy first draft it is important not to work towards perfection.  We have to move through the writing process and the first couple times may not be pretty but it is still an important part of the writing process. There is no stepping over or around the process. One cannot learn and develop their writing skills and flesh out their story without working through all the stages of planning and writing a first draft usually a less than gleaming first draft. We learn from creating that first story and moving through the process. The perfection happens in the rewrites and editing process. Every stage in writing a family history story is important in the process. Don’t try to shorten your path there is so much to learn from the process.
Tool: Enjoy every part of the writing process from finding the story to mapping and outlining your scenes with our scene guide in Finding the Story, Workbook No. 3